I’ve been thinking a lot this week about why I blog. I mean, I haven’t been able to post more than once a week lately because it’s become such a huge production. First there’s the crafting, which I would do regardless of whether or not I had a website. But then, there’s the photo shoot, which must be at the right time of day in the right light from every angle to ensure I get a really good shot. With three little kids, photo shoots can be a challenge. No, let me rephrase that. With a 2 year old, actually accomplishing anything without his help is near impossible. I do read choo-choo books over and over again, tickle and giggle and wipe noses and stuff like that. I’ve got no complaints there for the most part. (As long as you don’t count the stubborn 4 year old who refuses to go potty if you actually ask him to, even though he’s been holding himself, crossing his legs and squatting and wiggling for the past five minutes– so you tell him he doesn’t get a bedtime story until he goes potty, which sends him into torrential screaming and fits with lying in the hall and kicking the door and screaming while you put the little one to bed which takes about 15 minutes, which is a lot of really loud screaming and kicking. So yeah, really no complaints unless you count that.)
And then there is the “high-school-ness” I feel about the craft blog world. I mean, I want to be popular. I want the cool girls to visit my site and maybe even COMMENT *gasp*. And, unless I really watch it, I fall into the self comparison trap. Because, you know, she takes beautiful photos, she’s just nonstop crafting crazy, and she’s just really cool.
So, I’ve contemplated shutting the blog down altogether. Don’t feel good about that. Taking the summer off? No. I just need to chill out. No more perfectionistic paralyses. I started this blog to be a journal my mom could read. A place to write stuff, to record this time of being a young mom and wanting to be more– to be a complete person who dreams and works and lives those dreams. But, it’s been more show and tell. Trying to show off? Could that be a way to state it? I guess blogging in any form is a little self absorbed… But that’s okay. I think everyone is worth showing off. So, show off crafty bloggers. I will too…
But, I just can’t be all about the photos. If I’m going to keep doing this, I’ve got to be me, because sometimes I just have something to say.
Hi Jess-
I’m not sure if I’ve ever said hello, but I enjoy your blog, and am glad you find time for it. I have a two year old too, so I know what that’s like!
you just took the words right out of my mouth – i feel exactly the same way about my blog and the craft blog community as a whole. just keep on writing when and if you feel like it (or get the chance!), it’s always a nice treat to see you pop up in my bloglines : )
I really enjoy your blog. I hope you’ll continue! And, you are an amazingly crafty gal! I love my handmade journal that I bought from your etsy site.
hi! thanks for sharing your feelings. earlier this year i had to take a break from blogging because i worried that i was becoming a praise-junkie, like i needed the positive comments to feel validated about what i was creating. i’ve always been off in some corner doing my thing. i had never been noticed before. this was something i really needed to think about. i came back with a fresh attitude. i appreciate the feedback, but my blog is really about creating a space that is uniquely my own – in look and content and spirit. in my rather disordly life, my blog is a real sanctuary. i hope that it can become a comfortable medium for you too; you’re a true talent.
Don’t quit! I love reading about your craftiness, now matter how many or few posts you write. I have 4 kiddos and know how hard it is to make time to post, but it is always fun to hear from others who enjoy your creations. Don’t worry about the popularity contest, just have fun with it!
Hello,
I totally get your “high-schoolness” theory. I felt that for awhile too. But, I now consider my blog my adult diary. Visual and full of blabbing that may or maynot be for my eyes only. I just have so much fun drinking my coffee in the morning while my 3 little ones are still sleeping….and I’m smiling away reading fun blogs. It gets my adrenaline going and keeps feeding my creative side. I havn’t posted in my blog for quite awhile…but I am not allowing myself to feel guilty. It’s summer. And there’s stuff to do! Have a good day and keep feeding your creative side!
Thanks all-
I love my blog and reading and finding connections with other artsy crafty moms out there. What a miracle of modern technology! I just realized that it has just become more about what I do (then conversely what I didn’t get done) than about who I am. And that happened without me even noticing it. All of a sudden I realized that I cared about being noticed and validated and praised and that bugs me.
It’s also just hard to find the balance about what to post. I really am a little scared to post more about my real life and kids. Will that put them at risk? Will some weirdo steal photos or figure out our address? How big of a risk is that, and is it worth the risk?
So, it’s all a balancing act. Being real, enjoying the connections, including my life…
xoxo,
jess
after reading your post I thought I should stop lurking and let you know that I enjoy reading your blog and please don’t give it up. Sorry it is not a comment from one of the popular cool kids.
Don’t worry about the perfect photo or having the right craft. We just love seeing other people’s work for inspiration for our own projects!
that is so the reason I set up a blog, but never published. i could not get over the huge amount of time it must take and with 3 very young kids, i don’t have any–either craft or blog, I prefer to read others’ blogs and make stuff…and the photo thing, it is just crazy how much photo talent there is out there!! I so totally related to your comments, esp about the being afraid for your kids, I am even a bit spooked about flickr posts of my kids…crazy world this is!
And look how many lovely comments you got! I will miss you if you take a break, but I understand, agree, and am guilty
And it’s funny how I end up treating the blog world like I treat my ward. There are the popular chicks (the out going and overly social ones) and then there is everybody else, so what do I do? show off and befriend everybody else (and secretly wish to be a popular chick!)
ooohhh….I have been thinking along similar lines as well. I have long dissected my love/hate interest in blogs. I am convinced it has to do with ego. Would anyone continue to blog if there were absolutely NO comments/replys? Would the real bloggers then stand up? I started one and then had to stop. I just couldn’t keep my heart intact and still blog. It isn’t for me, and I can’t hide it. I think you should do some real searching and figure out for yourself why blogging is so darn important. What if the only people who read it were your neighbors? Wouldnt’ that be funny? And maybe a bit scary? I continue to look at blogs, because there are so many wonderful women out there willing to take the time out of their day to share their lives (you included) and that is a part of the human experience worth being involved with. I commend you, you have a good sense of priority and are discerning enough to figure out the seedy side of some of this. Take care, and peace to you always,
Smiles,
Heather
Oh I hear you loud and clear; oh I do.
I have been there and back and I’m still here doing what I do. I hope u do too.
You gotta be u.
hatu*
I know just how you feel! but I hope you never “shut down” I love coming here and reading about you and your life…
I think you’ve hit the nail on the head for the way that a lot of us feel about craft blogging. I’ve too, contemplated giving it up because not only is it a lot of work to post, it IS a bummer when it feels like no one out there is reading. (I was never popular in school, why should I feel that way in a world when most people never even meet, right?) Either way, I understand how you feel, and I personally would be sad to see you quit blogging. I enjoy your blog so much!
Yup, I have so being getting into the ‘Will they like me? I hope they like me.’ trap. So getting into it. But through my blog I have found a love of photography I never knew I had, and even if I really suck at it, and am a lonely blogging soul talking to myself, that discovery in itself has been worth the journey.
Thanks for the this thoughtful post. I really enjoy your weblog!
wow! you said exactly what I have been thinking for a while. i actually get stressed out when I am taking a picture for my blog because it might not be “good enough” I dropped out of color week two weeks ago because I felt like it was a contest to see who takes the best pictures.I am a mom of two and understand the commitment to blogging it is hard and sometimes you are so tired you don’t feel like posting. so I say do what makes you happy. personally, i think your blog is great.
i’ve been going through so many of these thoughts myself, lately.
thank you for sharing honestly.
i’ve been a lurker here for awhile, and really enjoy what you do, so i would miss you if you left (but would certainly understand).
you do so much jess, i really don’t know what to say..even as your sister-in-law.
but look deep down in your heart, pray about it and the answer will come to you. Trust your first instinct…would it be really bad to take a mini vacation? we will all miss you but take it as a time to enjoy the kids, and then have a bunch of fun stuff to share later with the rest of us in the cyber-world! Love to you all from all of us here!
I just stumbled on your site.
This post says exactly what I have been feeling lately.
I feel sad about it-and I haven’t decided what to do.
It seems to help me look at things differently and grow in many ways, but it also is sort of addicting and takes way too much time. I have almost nothing left for crafts or art.
Good luck to you…..
You’re one of the “popular girls” in my eyes
I enjoy your blog and hope you find the balance you seek.
Part of the reason I started a blog was to share with my friends and family a bit of my life. My blog is based around thrift which is my passion. I guess it is a bit of show and tell. I was brought to your site from Moki’s blog so I am a first time visitor. To me blogging is an outlet that is touches all forms of creativity that I am lacking. I have a 4 & 6 year old that are both high spirited and often draining on my energy. I use my blog as dessert if I finish my dinner. After the kids are asleep I can sit down at my computer and write in my blog, post photos and visit my favorite blogs. I was selling on eBay intensely for the last 8 months. I was making some good money which helped our family financially get through the year but I realized I had stopped enjoying thrift shopping. I was always looking for the next hot item to sell and not for the next beautiful, vintage item to bring into my home and enjoy. I stopped my auctions this week for a two month break and the release of stress from my body is incredible. I would suggest taking a step back and remembering why you started and when it last felt good to write in your blog. Try to recreate that feeling and go from there. Be unique and try to stay true to yourself.
It is hard isn’t it? I’m a stay at home mom with two little ones, and too many other things going on as well. My blog is my little hello to friends and family, to tell them random things that are going on in my life. I get a few comments, but more often my family says they love reading my blog everyday. And honestly, that means more to me than anything. Relax, breath and enjoy what you do – and take care.
Wow, that hit a nerve…
Don’t stop. It’s not all about pride, it’s more about bonding. Women need bonding. It is important to have it in your “real flesh and blood life” of course, but this is a way you bond with like spirits too. Some day you’ll get to meet Moki and the others and you’ll already know and love each other.
Keep doing it for me. I miss you so much and this is the only way I SEE anything you are doing, or know any thing you are feeling or thinking. I know it is time consuming, so follow the spirit. But you are such a GOOD WRITER, not just a crafter. And I love the picture of the dogs, the iris, Brenna’s bear, the quilt blocks, on and on. We are counseled to journal, this covers a lot of bases. I don’t have or make enough time to write all the things I wish or think I should. But I do understand the letting something get out of control and be too time consuming. Balance, that crazy concept… so hard to find. Follow the spirit. You can choose the good motives in your heart.
Love you!! xoxoxox
Jess-
I have been so bad about blogging–no time, and when I get on the computer at night, I fall asleep! I enjoy your posts, and you are popular (esp after the block swap) You are doing this for you and for other reasons, but it does get frustrating. After seeing old and new crafty friends at the Renegade Fair this past weekend, it seems we have all been so busy right now and have dropped out of sight. I take comfort in this crafting community—I like to be there for people, and it is nice they have been there for me when I needed to vent, to share, or to brag. Sometimes, when you work alone or at home,you NEED some validation—meeting my customers at shows is such a shot in the arm! Even if no one buys, if they comment on how they like my ideas or fabric selection, I am tickled (because not everyone wants or needs or can afford another bag). The website is busy and slow, and unfortunately, that is my own fault–not enough time to update, and my pictures stink, since I never have the right light, etc for pictures. But, in two days I got two orders and praise and am getting ready for shows, so this gives me a little push to get ready and make things and sparks the creative juices. Of course, it takes away time from finishing my quilt, but in the mean time, have been using my new found quilting skills to design quilted items and to enjoy the freedom and creativity quilting brings. I have you to thank for that!
sorry to ramble, you touched a chord with me and lots of others–keep up your amazing work, and write when you have time. we will be here to read and share.
that was beautiful. so much how I feel. thank you for the honesty……i am coming from moki’s site…and will be back, though I am finding with my own confusions, fustrations with motherhood and my own three kids…..posting and surfing is becoming less and less.