Lest anyone get the idea that we’ve enter into organized tranquility, I thought I’d post some photos of real life here. The big table is no longer out of reach. As you can imagine, this really complicates things around here.
I hope you all had a good Easter weekend. I love it when General Conference falls on Easter weekend. Don’t get me wrong, I love going to church on Sundays (all 3 hours of it) but the biannual break is most welcome, and when it falls on Easter it gives even more time for thought and rest and contemplation.
I try to be really positive here on the blog, try to make it a place where I can record my successes and hopefully inspire someone else out there, but I have to admit lately that I’ve been a bit overwhelmed. There are times and circumstances that just make us painfully aware of our weaknesses and shortcomings– and I feel myself in that place very frequently lately. I am doing exactly what it is I’ve always wanted to do. I’m the mother of a large family. I get to be with each of those little children everyday to help them learn and to try to help them discover and reach their full potential. I’ve been blessed with a view of the big picture, of what I want to create– I might even say I’ve been called to it. I always knew it would be hard, really hard, but there are just some things I didn’t have any clue would be this hard. Being a parent is difficult on so many emotional and spiritual levels I didn’t even know existed. Throw on top of that other relationships, church responsibilities, and never ending mountains of laundry and sometimes I just want to say– “Sorry, I just don’t have it in me. This whole thing you’ve asked me to do, Lord, is way more than I’m capable of. Is there some other way? Can it be easier somehow?”
And this weekend I realized I’m not alone in feeling that way. Jesus felt the same way. He knew what it was he was called to do. He knew the beginning from the end, the essential nature of his role in God’s eternal plan, but still he said, “Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me.” (Luke 22:42) Somehow, even with his infinite knowledge, the weight of what he was called to bear was surprising when he was actually experiencing it– more than he thought he could endure. But, he knew it was his role to fulfill, his feat to accomplish, and so he faithfully said, “Nevertheless, not my will, but thine be done. And there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him. ” (Luke 22:43)
I know what I’ve been called to do does not compare in magnitude to what the Savior did, but it is important, even essential in some sense. And, it probably can’t be easier. I just need to trust in his will,
and draw strength from my angel(s).
Love this Jessica.
Thanks Jessica…You’re awesome. Yes, thank goodness for the Atonement and Conference to refocus
Well said. I’ve had those same thoughts and feelings this week. It’s nice to know I’m not alone.
First, it’s great to know you are human, and not a “super” being
Second, OMG, I want to scoop up that munchkin and smother him in kisses. What a cutie pie!
So sorry you feel that way—I can so relate! I’m so grateful for you though, cause even though you may feel like it’s too hard, you do so much so well. You are a huge inspiration to me and have really helped me to think more about how to shape and create a wonderful family life. I will always be grateful for the books and guidance, even your amazing example.
This is great Jessica. I know what you mean… I try to be positive on my blog too, but I also try to share the “crumbs” on occasion, because I think it’s important to share the reality… that life can be a struggle for every one of us!
And I feel closer with my friends when they’re willing to be vulnerable, and post about the trials of life and not just the blissful times. I think I feel more connected with those friends because we ALL have days as a mother when we just feel overwhelmed and unequal to the task, and we can all relate to and empathize with those feelings.
I too, am grateful for a Savior who endured more than we could possibly imagine, and who is the perfect example for us to follow.
Love ya!
It is so refreshing for me (as a reader of wonderful blogs like yours) to see that you are just as human as the rest of us (meaning me!) Lately I’ve been feeling just the way you described especially since my oldest is just reaching that wonderful, exciting and slightly scary adolesent stage!!! :-0 It is so humbling to remember that our saviour felt that way too, but the task before him was so much more overwhelming than a mere almost teenager and a bunch of littles!